An old couple who hadn't celebrated Halloween in a long time, decided
to dress up and go out.
The woman went into her bedroom, stripped naked, and tied a lemon
between her legs.
When she came out, the old man cried, "You can't go out like that!"
She said, "I can go any way I like and so can you."
He retired to the bedroom and came out stark raving naked with a potato tied to his tallywhaker.
The old woman says, "You're going out like that?"
He replies, "Yep, if you can go as a sour puss,
I can go as a dick-tator."